UPDATE JULY 1 2019. This is too sensitive ok. The material on the Leon page under musical psych is updated now so just go there instead.
I am not sure why the image flashes. It may be a data overload. It is not any animation of mine, but it seems to flash on some devices at least.
Lord Jesus please just watch over this ok make it to come out right. Amen. Nomine padre filio spirito santo.
for Real Jesu there is like hundreds of pages here.
UPDATE JUNE 24-25.
Ok this is FREAKING EMOTIONAL. (We need to take it off the internet or give it a password or something, password protect for real because there might be a link I forgot to take down and also, anyone who has a neocities account is probably reading every flipping update and this is not TMZ ok people are so nasty!).
I have no idea how it happened but it did and the whole thing like flipped my life over. It was like open heart surgery on my emotional heart, and dont think it didnt hurt like hell after I woke up. IT DID. Now I feel so flipping weird ok so just bear that in mind when u are reading it there are plenty of other materials we could use for this whole psych thing we dont have to use this. Its all over youtube MICROSOFT BACKED SPIN, TED TALKS AND COLLEGE TALKS ETC we can use any of that. We have to put it in a context, right? Ok. I mean psychology is kind of private so is love, that's a private thing sometimes. Its= delicate right. And obviously its not a one week class. Thats funny! LOL.
MADDY"S DEBUT ALBUM UNDER STAGE NAME CHERRY CRUSHA,
HISTOIRE DE COEUR
DEDICATED TO DJ LLOYD IN CASE YOU DIDN'T KNOW BUT HELLO HOW COULD YOU NOT? LOL
Also this is not the Lloyd from "lloyd ladies team" that guy is a pXXp . ok. I never even heard of that.
IF YOU THINK YOU KNOW THE HISTOIRE, TAKE THE QUIZ NOW:
HISTORY OF A HEART QUIZ
This album is featured here as an example of what Musical Psychology actually does irl.
It is also being considered for a "jemmy" which is when Buscemi dumps blue jemz all over you. yeah. ok so maybe its not good enough for that yet. Now he's gonna come after me big time JAJAJAJAJAJAJA.
This may also be used as a syllabus for the class "whole honkin load" which is the way that Childish Gambino reacted when she couldnt figure out the musical psychology.
LOL The real name of the class is Drunk as Dionisio, dangerous disc jockey addictions.
ok thats not the real name either Im just messing around. This would be a one week class where you listen to four songs per day and attempt to grasp the psychology of it. If you fail, that's because you don't understand histoire de coeur so go back and listen to it again.

HOME

SIDE A


WEEKS ONE THROUGH FOUR: SOCIOLOGY STUDY.
WEEK ONE: VENDETTA, THE BEAUTY OF ITALIAN SPORTS CARS, AND THE SOCIOLOGY OF FEUDAL ECONOMIC AND SOCIAL GOVERNMENTS LIKE CORLEONE, SICILY. CORLEONE FOR EXAMPLE MEANS LIONHEART AND MAY MAKE REFERENCE TO RICHARD LIONHEART. IT IS LOADED WITH CHURCHES WHICH MAY BE WHY SATAN WAS SO INTENT ON WRECKING IT--JEALOUSY.

There is a considerable fascination with Sicilian culture in the US largely due to the books by Mario Puzo and the Godfather Movies.
In fact Sicily is an ancient culture which had its own oral history for thousands of years.
The island was so strategically located that everyone wanted it.
Much of the perceived evil in the culture is due to the fact that the ancient practice of Vendetta (link to Leon paper?) and also Prohibition, which I mean, isn't that like nixon? Why would someone take away wine from a southern European? Or beer from a German? but we digresse. Here we see the remains of a feudal castle the likes of which are extant all over the place in Sicily and you can see the garden in the foreground.
• 1. Bensonhurst Graduation, October 8 2018
As our story opens, the protagonist, Milk Dud, who at this point is unfamiliar with the interior dimensions of life, is composing a song to pay homage to the malavita, in honor of her upcoming Bensonhurst Graduation.

Lyrics: VERSE ONE: There ain't no safe you ain't crackin'/you never needed no key/your cell phone never got no tracking/you're a gangsta casing out the cyber streets./Big Al's so proud of you/he told me that you're almost through!
CHORUS: you boost that new Bugatti, and you're gonna get an A/you boost that New Bugatti and you graduate today! VERSE TWO: quarter to four in the mornin//Those cops aint tired, no no no/They're high on sugar from the doughnuts yeah/and they don't wanna go home/but you're up with the pros, you jack it right from out their nose! REPEAT CHORUS VERSE THREE: my lawyer filed a motion/to get reasonable doubt in the doo oo oor/you want a transfer of venue?/you gotta gimme some more/ Your honor, may I say? the criminal just drove away!
REPEAT CHORUS.



WEEK TWO: SOCIOLOGY WINE AS A VESSEL OF CULTURE.
THERE IS A SICILIAN PROVERB: EAT MEAT FOR LONG LIFE, but there is another, LEVAMI IL VINO E ME LEVA LA VITA.

Wine is not only a beverage for this culture it was like a river that defined the seasons, and the social life of a community.
The famous lucille ball wine tromping scene was filmed in Sicily not far from Casteldaccia or Caltanisetta is this true.

Homemade wine has a lot of water, can be easily consumed by children, and is far from the gourmet product most Americans associate with "Italian wine"
2. Wine Flows (possibly the tenth?)

Without realizing it, MD attempts to justify the criminal activity of the malavita by explaining that they are truly generous and provide free food and drink to all who are in need.

Lyrics: He's got dirty money his tax returns are funny, I'll chalk it up to jealousy/because wine flows where my Godfather goes and all of his shows are free/Gringos say he's lazy, his lawyers say he's crazy, its 'cause he comes from Sicily/because wine flows etc./There's something about the way that he shines when he's singing his lines, he's an angel of grace/a secret that nobody can tell, is he locked in a cell? or is he down at the place?/call him a good fella, but I just wanna tell ya, that I love the family,because wine flows etc.



WEEK THREE: PRISON SYSTEM SOCIOLOGY:
THE TREMENDOUS BUSINESS OF INCARCERATION.

Im too tired to write anymore write now ok.
• 3. Placas (possibly the 14th? Felipe's cumbia show would have been the 12th, I think.)
The protagonist also wishes to use a cumbia to sing about the Mexican border culture, in a cumbia version of the popular corrido ballads that some people she knew listened to so much.

Lyrics: Un aire de Gabuzzo te quieres dar, y el unico que logras es hacerte arrestar, quisas que llegue el dia en que te quiero liberar/No tienes ni si quiera papeles de aqui ni de alla, y tampoco te das cuenta la frontera donde esta, !juegas tanto con las leyes, que tristeza que me das!/Estoy haciendo placas a tu gusto, tantas placas, a me me da la gana de arrancar de esta prison, me has hecho de mi vida un infierno de cadenas, y la unica esperanza es tocar discos at the Lot/estoy haciendo placas a tu gusto, tantas placas, pero si no me sueltes no se que va a ser de mi, me encierras en la selda mas oscura de este carcel y lamento aquel dia que conoci a the police.
TRANSLATION: part one: the cop: You want to put on airs like a mobster, but the only thing you achieve is you get yourself arrested, and who knows if there will ever come a day when I want to set you free?/You don't even have papers from USA or Mexico, and you don't even know where the border is, you play so much with the laws, you make me so sad!
Part two: the Latino answers: I am making license plates the way you want, so many of them, all I want to do is get out of this jail, you have made my life a hell of chains, and the only hope I have is to play records at the LOT.
I am making license plates the way you want, so many of them, but if you don't release me idk what will become of me? You lock me in teh darkest cell of the jail, and I cry over the day I ever met the police.


Some notes after looking back at diary (which I rarely do.) At this point in Histoire de Coeur, it seems like a regular humorous crusha. For example--.
diary Entry October 11: Why would Lloyd be on my mind? On Gabuzzo chronicles webpage, October 16 (tuesday) the story was something like the police cornered Lloyd, Barbie and Paul in the container while they were making that guava juice water gun fuel. diary entry october 17th: Frankie V. Obsession. (its really frankie J but due to Valexaire I changed it to Frankie V.) Lloyd...es the lloyd. what am I hearing? What's the name of this song?
diary Entry October 18: After some notes about the chocolate recipe, there's an entry that goes something like this--"the chocolate is just the lead up to this show Dinner with Lloyd..with dj Lloyd. Desde que estoy pues enam. de Lloyd tengo que mirar su show por fuerza."
This was the last song for October, then there was the chocopop thing and the whole Rowland Review thing.

EDIT. I WANNA BE A GABUGLIONAIRE

This is an additional track which never got Recorded, which was thought up right before the death of Blue Jemz. (who at the time the protagonist had never heard of.)

Early in November, the protagonist has been taking note of everything Lloyd does in her diary along with some notes about the Lava company and some academic stuff.
However, she still isn't really paying attention to that.
At the same time, the musical frequency is still tuned in to the gangstas as you can see by the following lyrics written Sunday november 8, using one of the protagonist's favorite tracks I WANNA BE A BILLIONAIRE.
In fact if you think about it, the world of Lot radio was simply morphing into one big Gabuzzo gang, much to the protagonists' delight.
This was the main frequency in the protagonist's psyche.
I wanna be a Gabuglionaire, so effin bad, boost all of the wheelz I never had. I wanna be on the cover of Fabuzzo magazine, and guest star on the show renee Christine. O every time I close my eyes, I smell the smell of Spurge Man's pies, a different flavor every night oo I I swear, I want positive reality's hair, Can I be a Gabuglionaire? WOO O


• WEEK FOUR: SOCIOLOGY. MUSIC FOR CHANGE.
  
  4. Come on Lloydski November 16.
Jamming out to Dexys Midnight Runners, and fascinated by the unique howls and screeches of the lead vocalist and the generally soulful sound the band is famous for, the protagonist is delighted to discover that "Kevin Rowland is my spirit animal!"
She then sings a song about "changing the frequency" of the Brooklyn barrio in which Frankie V has "a dream about the radio" and asks Lloydski to "bring it" (and not just robertas pizza ok but bring the music) and make the dream come true.
EDIT: in the Padrino culture, the barrio is sometimes ALL there is.
Some of the gangstas are afraid of the trains because they cna't read or understand the stops, so they get drivers to drive them places and their bodyguards go with them everywhere also to help them navigate the unknown parts of the city, which is pretty much everywhere outside the barrio.
While, within the barrio they know EVERYTHING and they rule all.
Lyrics: francois valexaire had a dream about the radio but he could not do it solo. the friars cried, they wanted soul and who could blame them?/You, Lloyd, hey lloyd, now you're my BFF 112211222 and we can sing this for the friars! /Come on Lloydski o come on come with me, will you help me change the frequency? o lloyd you're the best, oh I heard from the rest, at the Tiki, o come on LLoydski!/These people around Nassau wear beaten down eyes sunk in smoke dried faces, so resigned to higher rent rates, but not us! No, not us! We are so damn hipster clever! Remember 112211222 and we can change the streets forever


• WEEKS FIVE THROUGH EIGHT. PSYCHOLOGICAL STUDY.
  5. Crazy Christmas JANUARY 6
December was the strangest thing that ever happened to the protagonist, Milk Dud.

EDIT: The lot radio was transmitting from Times Square in a converted money changing office -- dud laughed, probably because Quentin Montargis from the movie tais tois (shut up in French) was arrested for botching up a robbery in a money changing office, and Milk Dud was still half tuned in to gangsta waves. She even envisioned Frankie v dressing as a gangsta or pirate forget which, and the lot crew invading the M and M store to get breakfast.
In spite of this cool stuff, there was a lot of bad vibes in the chat and She was "fixing to ditch"
However at the same time, around the feast of Juan Diego, (not a warlock after all) After Beppo and DJ Lindsey mentioned that someone named Blue Jemz (Buscemi) had died, she found out that he was a friend of Lloyd and said to God to please let Buscemi go to cheer up Lloyd.
Since Milk dud often did this sort of thing, there was nothing out of the ordinary about it. OR SO SHE THOUGHT.
She tuned in to TSX "on the regular" dropped such tunes in Lloyd's honor as "shorty is a killer", and even thought that the extra long crush trip was cool, especially since it smelled like sugar which is wafting through the air.
She tripped on the sugar without realizing it, and then slept more peacefully then she ever could remember doing, as if someone else was patrolling the perimter. Who? She didnt know.
But what in the fabuzzo was going on? only Jah could say. The moon? A burning fire? a cloud of haze?


January 3rd, a Thursday and the usual day of Dinner with L, there is a note that at some recent time, the City angel (she had started to think of him in this way) appeared in the scene during some festa which was connected to blue, UPDATE: This occured on December 22nd, I think. Check this out O MY GOD THIS IS WHEN IT STARTED!We're talking six months of crusha. Today is June 25 thats SIX MONTHS. It isn't even a crusha its a trip. It goes from crusha to all this other stuff. Now that has to be a world record of some kind.wearing twinkly shades and white jeans and a white hoodie (as far as milk dud can recall because something happened that night which was really painful and totally unfamiliar, causing her to yelp in pain, and then fall down on the floor and weep and then, forget the whole thing and even Forget that she forgot it---because who wants to suffer? Hello?---and so it was not written down or even known, which is because of ignorance of psychology. Much later, when Blue became the doctor, he showed her the thing that she had forgotten, but it was still too messed up to think of it.)
All attempts to resume normal life were hijacked, until God helped Milk Dud to write the following song.
Lyrics: crazy christmas, you hazed out my heart, and the very next day you told me to pray/this year Im trying to hear, Im grying to pay attention./November is a time to die, a time for ditching but the moon was in the sky. Im the haze king! Do you recognize me? Woah, my boat is tipping, so please don't capsize me!/Happy Christmas, do I have your attention? I'm calling you from a mystical dimension, I dont know just how long I've been knocking at your door so could you please let me in?/REPEAT CHORUS/Im acting cool and Im stuntin wise, Im trying to move but I feel hypnotized, All I wanted was something to rely on, me? Im tryina find a way back to Zion, a Fabbuzzo on the cover of a vanity fair, it turned into sugar and the smell was everwhere ooooo hooo now I found real love don't let me lose it again REPEAT CHORUS

This poem also surfaced at around this time:
L is for Lot, and that's where we start, Cause music is medicine, good for the heart
L is for Leon, Matilda's main Man, who got wacked and who wacked a big phony named stan.
L is for Lava, that blows up so bright, attracting the eye like a star in the night.
L is for Lost, which is easy to do, it could happen to me, it could happen to you.
L is for Lloyd, we've been through this before, good luck trying to leave, good luck, that's for sure.
L is for Love, which is more than it seems, its like a big mystery that exceeds all dreams.
And some time later, (when? not sure) the seventh L was added, L is for Listen, be quiet and pray, so you can understand what Jah wants to say.


• 6. Candy Isn't Casual
Waking up in some way from the haze cloud, the protagonist realizes that her heart is trying to say something, and seems to be crying for some reason.
She was listening to Rod Stewart who seemed to have been friendly with some soul brothers, but instead of doing the Motown song for the Lot radio, she wrote this one.
Lyrics: I can tell by your lips that you prolly been eatin cherries for ever, sno cap stars in the skies and you wanted to have some for dinner./we dont know how to talk about it, the stuff inside our hearts, that kind of candy isnt licorice baby cuz if you crunch it then you listen, it's too hard./If we stand here making jokes, would the laughter ease the suffering of my heart? Let me dry your tears, let us try to speak more clear, if your heart is tryina cry u should prolly look your soul in a mirror./REPEAT CHORUS


• 7. Hater Queen
Sometime in the middle of January the health department "visited" the Lot. At the same time, Lloyd was at Market Street and the adventures of Fetty and Milk Dud began, as Dud attempted to reform the unfamiliar emotions into a funny story about hijacking planes and commandeering fields of prime haze cultivations (this also blended with Fabio parasecoli and the whole license to cultivate and sell food theme.)
The javelins in milk dud's chest could not be explained, but putting the porta potty smack dab in the yard of the hater Queen was completely within dud's understanding. And so, the following song.

Lyrics: O hater queen, I've got a beef with you, o hater queen, aint you got sXXX to do? O hater queen, cause you waint got no poo./And where you drop its like a cherry ice, then we gotta mop but it always smells so nice, o hater queen, etc./You're so clean, look at you, you waint got no poo so mean, scoo bee doo, etc./You're so mean, I get an ulcer every time I catch a whiff of YOUUUUUUUU, when you smile I want to scream, I hate to be so gutter humor but its true! /So get your shovel let's try to make this right, o get your coat and then get out of sight, etc/


• 8. Haze Flag
In this remake of Dido's "white flag" the protagonist is still not very familiar with the interior emotions, and thus, unsure of what exactly the haze is. suspicous that it has overtaken everything, and mystified because the sugar haze is invisible yet simply the best thing ever.
She expresses the idea that the haze the strongest echiza ever yet encountered, thus, impossible to escape. Lloyd must have pulled a Jack Sparrow and thrown flour in her face (Will: you cheated! Jack: "pirate!"--remember this gif?:

) but the haze smells so good who cares.
Lyrics: I know you think that you won this haze battle, I'll tell you that./ But I just can't give in, it wouldn't be Sicilian I gotta holler back. / I promise Im not trying to make Jah get pumpy we've been through all that before. But I am not down with this Shxx. And I dont want to go back to the sugar ward./ There will be no haze flag above my door. Cuz I am Dud and always will be./I know the mob is to wedded to destruction to go back again. They fight trouble with trouble, they leave behind rubble, we shouldn't talk to them again. And if you live by the rules of forgiveness then I'm sure that that makes sense./ REPEAT chORUS. /And when we meet, it's a clash of wills, and you're gonna cheat to make me chill. / You'll spray that gas, and fire that gun, you'll haze my ass and I won't have time to run. But I am not down with this shxx etc. O MY GOD I FLIPPED!!!! LOL


SIDE B
• WEEKS NINE THROUGH TWELVE: ARTICULATION OF LOVE.
  9. Lot Radio USA
  DJ Lloyd had been out in California, Milk dud's new diary is mostly empty because the crusha was confusing the heck out of her and she didnt know what it was or why it was causing so much emotions, and she didnt know what to write.
  Nonetheless, in honor of the Lot's 3rd year anniversary party, which Frankie V went ahead and celebrated even though the DOH was still hating on him, she composed this Miley mashup.
  
  
  Lyrics: VERSE ONE: I Hop off the plane at JFK and I'm back in the hood again, Welcome to the land of Bensonhurst Wiiii will I still fit in? (this is a poetical license; in fact the hood was Ozone park not benson hurst) I get out of the pod, Here I am for the first time, look to my right and I see a girl power sign, this is all so crazy, everybody seems so hazy! My tummy is turnin and Im feeling kinda homesick, too much pizza and Im nervous, that's when the taxi man turns on the radio and the Frankie song is on, and the Frankie song is on, and the Frankie song is on, so I put my hands up they're playing my song etc. LOT RADIO USA. VERSE TWO: get to the club in my boosted bugatti and everybody's lookin at me now, that ride is sick its chopped its tricked its gotta be from out of town, its so hard with the mob not around me, its definitely not a Corleone party, so Why'd I leave the borghetto? I guess I never got the memo! My tummy turnin and Im feeling kinda homesick, too much gelato and I'm nervous, that's when the DJ dropped my fav tune and the Lloydski song was on. REPEAT CHORUS.
  
  
  
• 10. (your songs are) The Ones I Play March 3-6 (from looking at the crazy stuff in the diary, song was composed and uploaded in pieces from Sunday March 3d to Wednesday March 6)
February was a month of javelin pain, insomnia, crying like a river and loss of appetite, in which the protagonist started to be tired all the time, to cough and shiver all the time and not to be able to talk clearly.
She could not even think about talking to certain people without having a weeping session.
As milk dud had never been known to have these problems, the certain people asked her what in the heck was up?
They asked her if she was in love and she said no of course not what makes you say that?, so they told her to see a doctor and have a blood test, to make sure she was not afflicted by some blood borne illness.
The Fetty wap haze ward story was invaded by Blue Jemz who took over the therapy and explained that Dud was not just crushing but actually, in love, even though over the internet.
Dud felt sick and utterly shy and could not eat anything. Then Lloyd came back to do a show and she felt like flipping over the moon! IT WAS SO SO WEIRD.
She played the set until she stuffed herself on it and gorged on it over and over and over like as if she had never eaten before.
Then BJ tricked Milk dud into an articulation of love which due to utter confusion she had no idea how to do.
It was slow and came in little pieces.
All I know inside me my heart broke and I feel something now I didnt before. And all my dreams since a couple moons ago I'm so high Im trippin on your vibe and then I start to cry making me feel right. I just wish it goes forever now. Cuz all I hear is this baby love and we're all signging in one tongue waiting at the station for the train and buying underpriced cocaine we go one and two and three adn four and its all done but I want more all I know since yesterday your songs are the ones i play.
VERSE TWO how could I fall? but who woulndt fall for you? You dont need a crown, you're a king just being you. You're all I feel and you're everything on my mind every night its brighter than the starlight taking flight making me feel right. REPEAT CHORUS It makes me feel so shy it makes me feel so shaky all the time I think I'm gonna die, I really think I'm going out of my mind. REPEAT CHORUS
All I want is to say hello please say yes and dont say no your love falls down like pouring rain and javelins of pain, I know that I dont deserve this grace, its like Im sitting in God's embrace, all I know since yesterday your songs are the ones I play.



• 11. (all my) Crushas

At one point while guzzling sugar off and on for who knows how many hours and days, which Jemz said was ok because now we were like more adjusted to the emotions, (because before if guzzle, pass out and even fall down occasionally) Milk dud logged on to salute fawlty DL and give him the high five, so she said U killa whereuponhe said U crusha and she felt SO FLIPPING embarrassed that it was time to go to Yemen or something.
She tried to turn the emotions into a song about cookies.
But Jemz was having none of it and a story on Lloyds insta he winked about the dog pee, and then after that he made Dud feel better about the crusha. Like get over yourself etc etc and just figure it out. So, articulation soon rose up in the soul, resulting in this song.

Lyrics. I need a funny story to take the javelin out of my chest, inside me theres a war and theres something that I must confess. Blues sitting right on my bed he's looking right in my head he wants my honesty i swear I thought I saw him wink cuz the dog pee really stinks but i know what he wants to hear. everybody hides their tears I gotta put aside my fears. Im gonna give all my crushas away.VERSE TWO. It's so hard! Its' not about the cookie jar, its not about hte muscle car its all about the who you are. And every time I get hte blues I want to turn and run away but the articulation sessions says put it into an album time to stay not go, you just got to let love floooowww. REPEAT CHORUS. Crush one, Im not h ungry this is odd, crush TWo, I think Lloyd is God, Crush three please dont disappear! Imma tell u everythin, REPEAT CHORUS.



• 12. Put Back Those Tracks Song March 24 or 25.
After the shows of 2/21, and 3/14, the 3/21 show was never uploaded.
Being deprived of the cherry smoothie for too long resulted in Milk Dud lying on the floor mumbling and babbling.
Somehow though the voice of Darius seemed to help, and the woe formed into this remake of COME BACK SONG.

Lyrics: VERSE ONE: well i woke up again this morning, and wouldnt you know it? Javelin pain. and then I went and started coughin, this jonesin thing is driving me insane; CHORUS well I think u know Im crushin you so and yanking the show that was wrong. And baby I know u got your radio on, so this is my PUT BACK THOSE TRACKS song.
VERSE TWO. I think I mentioned I need to guzzle? Or do I need to take you to school? So let me do some more articulating, Im tryna say this just aint cool!
VERSE THREE. I dont know how else I can say this? I spelled it out in blak, white and red. I got to get my daily dinner! So fork it over, before I"m deaaaaddddd.
REPEAT chORUS.


THE REST OF THESE SONGS NEED LYRIC TWEAKING EXCEPT FOR THE EL CHAPO WHICH IS JUST A COVER, NO LYRICS WERE CHANGED AT ALL.


• WEEKS 13-16: ARTICULATION OF FRUSTRATION AND PAIN.
  13. But I Said It, March 24 or 25 also.
This Selena song was a reaction to the idea which dawned on the protagonist, that maybe the jealous haters were messing around so she couldn't guzzle? HELLOOOO? WTH?????
DO NOT BLOCK THE SUGAR PLEASE!!! lol.
luckily some cherry trees were discovered in another garden at around this time. HA!

Lyrics. You dont have to worry about Hater frustration. cuz Im getting better at articulation. They wish and they try to mess around and make me cry Stop cuz I love you they hate the way I love you u dope u fine baby I'll be listenin on line its all right. I'm not too shy to shoot my mouth off all through your sweet set/ I love u much too much to hide my song aint finished yet.
So haters, I think that I said it....Think you hate it but I said it LA DA DA DA. Think you hate it but I said it, etc.
VERSE TWO: Im gonna say what I want, hope you get that. And baby once I say that, Im sure, no take backs. You're jealous that's fine..... (unresolved lyrics here) REPEAT CHORUS. BRIDGE: Your heart is full of jealousy. And you know Im speaking truthfully. You know you know you know just come and hear the show. REPEAT CHORUS.



• 14 El Corrido de El Chapo Guzman Loera (THIS IS AN APRIL FOOL OK LATER I WILL EXPLAIN WHAT HAPPENED WITH BLUE)

THESE TWO SONGS ARE HAARRRRD LOL

• The real #14. The Vendetta Song. Coming to be around March but was dropped in favor of Darius and Selena when the haters fuzzed up the track of 3/21.
This song is about what you give up when you go looking for the Godfather to protect you from your haters and people who want to hurt you, no matter who they are.
You don't even know that you have a heart or that you are a person because that's psychology, you can't know that until your heart wakes up.
It isnt' even really about vendetta in the end, but about everyone has the right to be free, women as much as men
Why should you have to live like a gypsy just to live, or crash with people just for protection>? YOU SHOULDN'T.
So it isn't specifically about one person, but all girls know this reality in some way.
And you don't see what you give up, maybe because you dont know the psychology and its just too complicated to grasp. And even if you DID grasp it and try to say something, well you prolly die. Like the saying, "men are afraid women will laugh at them, but women are afraid men will kill them." And that's why you find girls with "bad guys". Because they are running from "bad guys".So yeah, if HISTOIRE DE COEUR is the conclusion of this album, this song is the beginning.

Im so Gotti, I can say what I want, I'm so Gotti I can do what I want, I'm so Gotti I can go where I want, I can do what I want I can love who I want. YEAHH Here's a message for the bullies that are everywhere, you treat me like shXX and you dont' care, I think I got a guy with a gun now, think its time he's gonna put you on the run now. If you try to crash the new home, he's gonna tell you HELL NO, and you can call the cops all night think we dropped outta sight alright!
So I gotta hit the streets, gotta ditch the creeps, but where I gonna sleep How I gonna get along? I need a safe house, I need a safe school but I can't stop, and I wont stop, dont you understand that I have rights? can't you see you drive us to thug life? And I can't stop, and I won't stop, all I want is my liberty,( or dignity) if its good for you then its good for me
You've got the power so you beat me up, and I dont wanna screw you, so I'm a slut, think you got it all a little jumbled, Im hitting the pavement, so go find a lover, yeah, but now I need a meal and a bathroom, so why I gotta pay in the back room? You're all so effed up (or, you can't shut us up, no) I'm gonna speak up yeah, yeah yeah

• 15. TITLE TRACK FROM ALBUM: HISTOIRE DE COEUR
This song is the explanation of the whole album. I just wrote something and erased it all because its too darn sappy. Ok. I need a moment or maybe like I can't write it. Ok.

VERSE TWO
Lyrics: VERSE ONE: Jesus Christ, Il Signeur, donne la vie de son Coeur, chaque amour that comes after viene de lui, son coeur Sacre, Tout Puissant est l'amour, Force majeure, something major, its all right, God is talking, in the deeps of your soul.
VERSE TWO: Look inside, c'est ton coeur, C'est un monde interieur, et tu penses , "that don't matter" but you wrong, cuz it matters,/es un istoire, es un histoire de coeur, Blue Jemz comes in, its kind of hard to write, but as the morning comes the story's told, Es un histoire es un histoire de coeur
LLOYD he djs for the juice queens of the night, but that's not it I still don't have it right, I have to think about it and I have to pay attention because maybe then I'll know,
I said NIGHT I have to try to understand the dreams, I have to ask Buscemi what it means, He says it means something and I have to pay attention because maybe then I"ll know.



• 16. THE DEMISE OF CTT
And here we have a funny one resuling from when Brian Chase and crew supposed murdered CTT and took over their slot. JAJJAJAJAA.

Lyrics I wnet to do a show for that Francois Valexaire and he said you know what theres a family called the Gabuzzos and they are everywhere. THey will F u up, and they could live you in misery, but I said u know what? they just offered me 50 Gs to whack that CTT, and Im tellin ya, etc.VERSE TWO: I find myslef scoping out the booth at least TEN times a day, and you know, Its so unusual for me to whack a boss this way, I could do it tonight bc they both gonna be on the mic I try so hard to tell myself that this career choice can't be right but Im tellin ya...etc. I woulndnt mind it, if I knew that they had my back too, but I hate to think Im going to jail alone and there is nothing that I can do WOOOOOOOO etc.




THIS IS A MORE ARTICULATED THING RIGHT NOW.
JOHNNY ROCCA PHASE: NOTES FOR A NEW CHAPTER. HAZ COMO OTRO ALBUM, PORQUE YA HAY MUCHAS CANCIONES.

Since the protagonist got behind, because we were letting the whole thing settle, CASE STUDY OK CASE STUDY lol (which is actaully good because in your mind its good to think about, why would you love this person so intensely? Is there some rational reason? Someone asked the protagonist why when she was all confused about it in the winter and she had no idea how to articulate it in words. It is in the heart, not the words. But if you go over it with the musical psychologist, you are sure to understand better.) we are now listening to the Johnny Rocca I WANT IT TO BE REAL and putting it into a song by Dark Latin Groove called LA QUIERO A MORIR which is also in French JE L'AIME A MOURIR. Which me and Blue are mashing up into some kind of reality but that will have to be a new LP I think because this one is already stuffed!.

EL NUEVO CAPITULO EMPIEZA CON FTP? Y LUEGO--: J'AIME A MOURIR BY FRANCIS CABRAL pues fue inspo por esa cancion LA QUIERO A MORIR y ent. "THE SONG MAKES IT REAL" en la version aqui pero recuerda no pongas nada arriva en la pagina publica todavia ok. Y recuerda que puede aber muchos efectos emocionales ok.
To answer the question, porque es tan intenso un cierto amor, hay una razon, no es hechizeria, es algo que se puede articular y no es estupido no es immaduro, es perfectamente razonable.
TITULO POSSIBLE: THERE, I SAID IT porque cuando Rachel dice asi, no es su confesion de la verdad si no una mentira, porque ni su mama ni su padrastro quieren escuchar la verdad, es mas, nadie en el pueblo quiere escuchar la verdad. Asi que you think when someone says, there I said it que es una confesion pero talves no es una confesion si no otro cantinflear.
So the fact is, even a good communicator can be terrified enough to shut up if they are presented with enough death threats and etc. No todos somos tan fuerte como Pasolini y nisiquiera el confeso la verdad de su pasado.
?que tal doctor k opinas de eso? lol me gusta mas como suena la palabra roustabout pero tambien como k es bueno para gente no profesional. no te parece.
OK Check it out Jemmy porca loca Love u so bad!! TITLE COULD BE: THE SONG MAKES IT REAL. y tambien. Es la respuesta a la pregunta porque el amor tan intenso. Por eso.